Claiming Faith Amidst Fear – Zimmerman Family Adoption Story

Everything that the other kids want to do. He wants to be with that, looking at him as like a little brother and just kind of bring him along. He’s been a blessing in our family. It’s been amazing. I’ll call to maybe bring a child into a room. We are all called. Welcome to the imperfectly empowered podcast. With leading DIY health lifestyle blogger on a former empowering you to transform your life one imperfect day at a time. Hello. And welcome back to another episode of the imperfectly empowered podcast. I’m your host on a former today is a very, very special episode approximately a year ago. At this time I hosted an adoption gala here in Lancaster county, Pennsylvania. It was a black tie affair, and yes, it was a fundraiser for our own families, adoption of a little boy from the Pacific island of Samoa, but more importantly, The goal of the evening was to give local families a platform to share their adoption stories and to ultimately celebrate forever families. The name of the gala was called, bring them home and adoption gala to celebrate forever families. Today’s story is one of the stories that was shared. It was a video presentation. The second family story is coming at the end of this week. It will be produced at the end of this week. I am so excited to introduce you today to the Zimmerman family, Brad and Kate, and their five sweet kiddos, including Jose, their adopted son. This is a story you do not want to miss. Jose was not their first son that they adopted. And this episode I would like to dedicate. To all of the orphans who never come home on this side of heaven, enjoy the Zimmerman story. Hi, we’re the Zimmerman family. Um, my name is Brad. My name is Kate. My name is Brock ad-on TAC tin Camry, and we adopted Jose from Bogota, Columbia in 2020. Well, I’m proud. And Kate, I have known you guys since high school. This is so fun to be here. So Kate, I did not know you as well, but you two were a year ahead of me in high school. And you were a field hockey player. And how many times did you guys go to states slash lane states? Uh, twice. Twice in every do, did you win. Yeah, our freshmen and sophomore year, I just remember my years in high school, it was always a field hockey was either beating new records or winning things. It was always, you guys were so amazing. And then Brad, speaking of shattering records in high school, so Brad and I ran track together. Well clarification, I ran sticks. Yeah. But you were breaking up. Throwing those points. Your senior year, you won states, right? You never won. So you went to national what’s the nationals. My senior year never wants states, but you were breaking records. I remember that every time after we’d have a track meet and the announcements, Brad was breaking another record of some. Yeah, good times. Well, maybe for you, I was running around in circles until I was about to throw out to the right choice. There are high school sweethearts got married. You have four biological children and then your adopted Jose. At what point in your relationship did you, had you talked early on about adoption. At what point did that become part of your conversation for your family? Well, that’s a good, yeah. So, so for Kate, it kind of came into grim time stress, right? So Kate owns had adoption on her heart. Um, and I was kind of the approach that we can support people that are debating, whether it be financially or time or whatever that may be. So I was kind of like, we can be that supportive on the adoption side and what keto has had on her heart. And then I’d say, As we kind of processed through, we were, you know, at orphanages sometimes like Guatemala and things like that, where we serve sometimes together. Yeah. Yeah. And then one time I was Sam and you were down with Alan one time and things like that. And, uh, so we, through that, you know, I’m serving different orphanages at. Really is where my heart really started to change. Um, and, um, just as far as where, you know, you go into these orphanages and, you know, you know, you can’t save all of them, but I knew of 153 million orphans. Like we could help save the life of one or change the life, not safe, but help change the life of one. And, um, so that’s really through that where. Kind of came through and we talked one time, we were like, you don’t have this, the journey that we’re going to start and take at what point was that when you first had that conversation? yeah, so I have a niece and two nephews, actually three nephews now that are adopted. So I think it was always in like our family and you solve it and then you guys interact with them. It was a really cool experience. Rabbits actually in Guatemala. When I got our home study, cause we had talked about, and he was like, well, just get the papers. He’s like, well, think about it. And he went, no, where you going? And while you were in and I was at home and he called me and he was like, We’re supposed to do this. And it was just like, all right, here we go. Like, we’re going to start this journey. Like, I don’t know. What’s going to look like over to started it. So I got paperwork and we started like working on filling it all. Was there something in particular that you remember that made you think like, this is, I can’t remember. What was it about that, you know, when you’re in and I don’t know, like if there’s, anyone’s didn’t, you know, and I know a lot of you probably have, but like just in a third world country, like that. Serving like that. And you were there and you just see the happiness of all these children, people that really have nothing. And you look at that and you just go like, and I just kinda got to the point, like, what am I thinking? Like, why would I not say yes, I knew it was on her heart. Right. So I knew like the immediate time that I would be doing. Yes. Let’s start this process. Yes. I feel like we’re called to deal. Go in this direction. I knew she’d be all on board. So like, it was just me actually getting that. And she was awesome where like, he, I remember, like, I remember you just keep on saying like, don’t do this for me, but she kept on saying that like, don’t do this for me. I need you to feel that this is the direction that you want us to go. So it wasn’t one of those moments where it’s just like Kate lets you know, but it was honestly like a change of heart. And um, for me personally, it was reassuring. Um, because we did have biological children at the time, we’d all four of our kids, you know, got Allen Tate and Brock and Tenley. And, uh, so for me, there was a reassurance or Christmas time. So we do a, a little gift exchange for all of our kids, um, to exchange each other’s names. And what we do is we just put it in a hat. Like a lot of people do write their name on it, and then we just have them write. Two or three things that they really would like for Christmas, obviously it’s like small gifts just cause it’s between brothers and sisters. And, uh, I remember sitting at the kitchen table and, um, everyone exchanged their name and I think it was teed in God, his name. And he looked at it and he’s like, there’s only one thing on this list. And anyways, it came out supposed to be a surprise, right? You’re supposed to be the surprise of whose name you have. And, uh, I remember, you know, we found out that it’s Adeline and we’re like, Adam, I’m like, honestly, like, please just put more than one thing on your list, because like we have to, you’ll have multiple things. You don’t want to know exactly what you’re getting and I’m so. You know, we’re like how I’m pleased. And she’s like, that’s all I want to one month. And we’re like, well, please. And then, and then she started to get emotional. She’s like a mom and dad, that’s all I want. So we’re like tin, like, let me see the paper, like what’s on the paper. And it just said like, please put my money towards the adoption. And when that happened, it was kind of like, she would have been 10, 11 maybe. Yeah. So at that moment I was kind of. Wow. I mean, I got choked up. This is crazy. Like, because the process wasn’t where Kate and I felt called to adopt. And then we, like, we had the conversation, we started to have the conversations with the kids saying, what’s this gonna look like? How’s this gonna impact our family for the good and the. It’s humbling going kids. Like we see it. So simply another little kid needs at home. What’s the problem. And then we make it so cerebral. We’re like, okay, I see the finances. I see. You know, what is this child going to be like? Or are they going to want our house, like our house? They need a house that simply orphans. Yeah. Why not now? So then I, you know, I love hearing this because I think this is typical for a lot of couples where one. Spouse feels very strongly like they want to adopt. And the other one is not necessarily feeling the same, the same way. What would you say to a couple? Because sometimes it’s different. Sometimes it’s, you know, the husband wants to adopt and the wife doesn’t, you know, what would you say to somebody who’s in that position? How would you encourage them if they really have a heart to adopt, but their spouse is not very good. What would you say to that? I think for me, just pray. I felt like for Brad, like I couldn’t keep nagging him. I wasn’t going to nag him. It’s too big of a thing. It’s way too big of a thing. And and I needed him to be like a hundred percent. Yeah, I hear it’s, it’s a team effort. Like this is a family thing. So I think just, I remember just praying about it and be like, okay Lord, like, if this is supposed to happen, he’s going to come to me and he’s gonna tell me, and that’s exactly what happened. Like he came to me and he was like, we’re supposed to do this. And I’m like, all right, like, this is no more supposed to start this. And that was kind of confirmation for me too, to be like, okay, yeah, we are supposed to do this. Yeah. So, so you started the process and it was not without its challenges. Adopted. Yes. A little boy. And tell me about Curtis. So we have Jose, Jose is the little boy that they brought home, but they had another little point was about Cruz. So Cruz was a four year old little boy who had, um, definitely some health issues. He had a feeding tube, he had chronic lung. Um, and I remember when we got the file, I remember being like, oh, I remember telling Brad, like, we can’t say no, anyone that comes through. Right. So when we got the file, I was like, okay, Lord, like we’re supposed to do this. And I remember being overwhelmed. I was actually upstairs folding laundry. And I was like, I don’t know if I can do this. I have no medical background. I don’t know if I can do this, you know? And I sent it to Brad and I said to him, like, did you see the pictures? And he kind of came in and was like, I don’t remember him. No way have four kids. Like there’s, you know, my, and I was like, I just feel like God’s telling me we’re not supposed to say no to any kid that comes our way. And that was just our calling. I’m not saying it’s for everyone, but it was just our thing. Like we’re nuts, you know? So, um, we prayed about it and we started looking into like chop and just seeing like what that looks like. We did long story short, we said, yes. Started looking into more stuff with him with it. And, um, anyway, so yeah, we said yes. And I would think probably within it wasn’t that long, a few months, actually, we got like the call to like, okay, you guys are gonna start coming down and get him. And he was doing really well for the most part. I mean, he had a tank, an oxygen tank behind him. Like we had to look into all of that stuff, like for the flight, like it was. Of information. I felt very unequipped for. Um, but I really felt like the whole time we were like, this is confirmation, this is confirmation. And we had a lot of people praying for us, like along the way. Cause I think a lot of people knew that we’ve shared with, like, we don’t feel like this is really like what we’re capable of doing. But we felt like this was supposed to be our child. So, um, the day before we left, actually we got a call. We run a wedding and they said, uh, they said cruises in the hospital. Um, we think his, they just think he just pulled out his feeding tube and they’re trying to get it back. He CA he seems to mess with it a lot. So we were kind of like, okay, like, it didn’t seem like anything alarming. Um, so we’re like, are we scheduled to still fly out the next morning? And they’re like, yeah, just about everything being. Well, then I think that next morning we kind of like, it was a little bit more uneasy, but we weren’t like sure. And of course all of our kids were coming. Right. So it was like a big thing when you really needed to know. Yeah. So, um, the, I just remember who were in the airport at Texas swimmer, like second trip and our second, um, like, like in that text and they just said, Um, it’s not good. And Cruz actually has pancreatitis and he had a surgery and I just remember sitting there and I just, I just like bald, like I just cried and cried and cried. And I was just like, of course the thing that was going through my head was like, why now I’m sitting in the airport, you’re ready to get them. And you’re basically being told. Yeah, like good. And I was like, why now? Like why during all of this? Like why when all my kids are, all of our kids are coming down. What does this look like? Anyway, so, and I was crying and then of course Tina and our oldest son, he was looking at me and he was just, and he was very emotional. So. Well, you know, it was a really hard time, but we still didn’t have a lot of answers. We didn’t really know how bad it really was. So did you come back to Lancaster? No, no, no. We actually flew down. Okay. Cause we got there and we got into our hotel that night, late at night and we woke up the next morning and our agent Sariah, which was, she was amazing. She walked in and um, she started crying and she just is like, it’s not good. And she’s like, his chances are really, really slim. I think that was when it really hit us. Like, wow. So now we’re sitting Yeah. And I think that’s, what’s crazy about like, like, keep us talking about the process. Like as far as, even in the beginning of like, I think about like how your heart was separate adoption kind of was like, yeah, let’s go. Because like the journey and I always say like, life’s a story and drive a journey. Like the amount of work and you, you are familiar with this and any family that’s gone through it, you know, how much work and dedication there is to get to this moment right after paper. Yeah. we’re already there with all of that. And I mean, a lot of that landed on her shoulders, so to nothing of my shoulders, but like a lot of on hers and like just a ton of people. So you get to that moment of being matched and just to travel through that process, then I remember I was flying down, so yeah, we ended up in Bogota, Colombia, and then we got our family there and we’re meeting with Arjun down there, Sariah, and I’m not what we pictured. Right? Like it wasn’t, it wasn’t what we anticipated. There was so much preparation. And we get down there and he’s Cruz is in a hospital, in an area where it is not safe. It is not a good hospital. And, um, we basically had to take terms and trips, um, visiting crews in the hospital. The first time we get to see your son is basically in a hospital. Yeah. We actually went that day. When that first day we actually brought my, got to go in. So we weren’t signed. Like she wasn’t officially ours at that point where we didn’t sign the paperwork. And at once we sign everything’s our responsibility and they didn’t even, they weren’t even, they were like, that’s not even an option at this point. Like we’re not even going to do that. Um, cause we were thinking, I mean, we had process like let’s sign and let’s just like, get him out of here. You know, we haven’t got, but he wasn’t wasn’t even smart. So at that point it was like, we just have to trust. This is the best place for it right now. And like he is going to be okay. Yeah. Um, when we went back, we, we did go for a few days, then finally they got to say, and then you went first and got to see him yeah. Through like numerous meetings and things like that with the adoption agency, because there’s obviously laws that you’re dealing with the whole time. So to make sure that we’re drying things correctly and then the order’s just a different country. And, um, what was so crazy with. I would want it. The orphanage was sharing with us, how, like Cruz was like running around the orphanage on Friday saying like my family’s telling my mom and dad are coming. My mom and dad are coming and we were, we were coming on Sunday and on Saturday he ended up in the hospital. So like, it was like night and day difference of the videos that we’re capturing. And I see like, so when I went in to visit, um, cruise for the first time, He was out pretty well. And, um, so I just stood by side. I talked to him, you know, I, I prayed for him and just let them know that we, that came here for him. And, um, that’s crazy, but so I spend time with them and spend time with the doctors and nurses. And we just kind of tried to come up with a game plan. And, um, as much as you can plan at that point, when. You have your family of six and a third world trying to, you know, the child that you’ve longed for because. The crazy thing, as well as like we’ve been journeying, right? For like seven months or six months, whatever it was prior to that one years, I mean, years, you know, where you’re thinking about your child and not how you envision it specifically with crews with technology now, obviously like we were FaceTiming him, we were selling videos back and forth. So like our relationship with Cru. Has grown into a, a relationship of this is our son and I’m his dad, his mom committed, but, but Cruz knew that we loved them. He knew that we came down for him. He knew that we were by the sun. And, uh, um, so we were, we were there. Um, I mean, we, we stayed there. Unfortunately, Cruz passed away like three weeks later, then it’s one cruise, um, ended up passing away. And, uh, but why we were there, I went back home and then Keith was able to go visit with them. And when I’m not here, not, not here, I’ve never gotten home to Pennsylvania. Um, but I got to the place that we were staying down there, the Airbnb, um, and then another day of passing ki had the opportunity to go and visit with him as well. Um, and the hospital exploration there is totally different than your, you like. You kind of check into a book, but then I thought Cruz was on floor three and then I thought he was on Florida too. And then they send you up the floor of five. Like we’re in the world’s curves and then finally get them finally, a doctor that knows where they are. So just totally different the medical system so much out. And I’m not good at Spanish. I mean, I like stumbled through the best, but I am not fluent by any means, but then you had the opportunity to go with that. Um, you’re going to have to keep it together, which I’m like, okay, this is going to be he’s all tuned up. Like, you know, I’m just warning you. Like he’s really, you know, and I was like, okay. You know, um, anyway, so then when we walked in, they were like, are you going to be okay? You know, because I knew the next day, I think we were leaving. So I knew like this was my chance. Like for now, I’m hoping we’re going to come back and get it, but for them. So I walked in and actually it was really interesting. Um, he actually had his eyes open, even though he had a tube down his throat, which I don’t understand that. And he looked at me and he started almost. And the lady came over and was like, calm down, calm down. And then he kind of like his eyes kind of roll back and you could tell he wasn’t fully there. But I told Brad that was like, I think he knew, like I was there. Like he saw me and he recognized it was me. Right. You know? So I just there too. And we did the same thing. I prayed for him. He loves him and all that stuff. And, um, it was really, really hard, like really hard. And it was really, really hard on our kids, um, because they were hoping to come down to see their brother and they were allowing, and then we’d come back and we did a lot of crying that week and teed in Atlanta brought everybody was in tears, like randomly throughout the whole week. And I think it was just really difficult. So our, our whole trip change. Right. So plan things that we didn’t anticipate. And we actually spent some time as a family because we compete with crews at times. So we did some different things with the family. We did end up coming home then here and then unfortunately, well, there was a process that, yeah, they told us to come home, come home for a little bit because cruise was actually. Improving. So he was . Yeah. So things were looking good, but it was still going to take time until he got approval to actually fly home. So, and they said, how about you get your whole family home? And then our plan was that Kate NY, Kate was going to fly into. In about a week or so, and then be with Cruz while he’s in recovery. And then I was going to fly down or someone’s going to fly down and then we’d all fly home the other and bring crews, crews home. So we flew home and we decided to bring the family home and she would go and he would improve. And then you’d have like a day or two setback and then you would improve and then you have a date or two setback. And this went on for a couple of weeks and. Unfortunately, like we didn’t know what to do here at home. And, um, so there was moments where we were going to fly down and then they’re like, no, not ready yet. And anyways, we, we got a call, um, that next morning, um, in July. And, uh, unfortunately we found out that Chris passed away, like stab it in my heart for you. I just, you know, the whole process. You’re just like, Lord, here, here I am. Here’s my heart, you know, but I mean, it’s, it’s hard. It’s hard. It’s not easy. No. Ron. And we’re so thankful that we could actually see him talk with him. And they knew that we were pursuing him. We loved him coming down for him to bring him home. So then we started the process over and then you can talk about the grieving process as well, but we started the adoption process again, fairly quickly. There’s obviously a lot involved. Yeah. So for people that don’t understand, I mean, and this is an unusual situation. I mean really in the grand scheme of adoption, you ever had this very rare to happen, but it still speaks to that, to the fact that, you know, just because something is very hard doesn’t mean that it’s wrong when there’s money that comes out of it. And you still made all the difference in his life. Right? He actually did get. To files before we got Jose. And I was, yeah, I was not at all. I was just like, this is not the right timing. I told him I was anxious. Even open up the file. Yeah. Like, yeah. I was just like, it was just opening up old, hurting her and people who don’t understand. So you get matched, you get this, you literally get a file of your child. And then, so where did you start over? Did, I mean, you practically speaking, you had invested money and you had to start at certain place over. Right. At what point in the process do you have to start over or did you have to serve? Our agency did really good. Like you were still in the program, basically. You’re not back on the less, we had to update a few things, but really not that much. Like we had our home study, I think was pretty much like, okay. Yeah. Um, which I think also, like, I know encouragement for me, like. We’re tenacious. Like they didn’t want to give up either. So like they were all on board and we had family conversations about the process again, like, what does that sound like? What does that feel like? I, everyone was in the heart of the. We want to pursue another child. And so still one a child. We still want a younger sibling. And since everyone was still there and the mindset I think was what could help, at least me and us kind of push through to say, Yeah. And they were definitely ready before I was, I think I probably took the longest, I mean, I mean, I’m, mother’s heart. Listen, you don’t want to tell me, I can’t even find them. I mean, I think that, um, it was just a lot all through that. Again, our kids did ask the question. I mean, if we’re being honest, like I’m going to adopt another kid, that’s going to have so many medical and medical issues. And I mean, we had to have that conversation with them and be like, guys, Looking at crews, like we went and said yes to him, even though he never lived with us, he still knew he had a family. So there was a reason why we said yes to him. So I think at that point it was like a good conversation. Like, you know what, like, we don’t know what, like, we don’t know what child we’re going to get matched with. Again, you need to be open to anything. So I think that fear though is a very. That’s a real thing, you know, especially for the kids and I think went through it. So, yeah. And even like, when we got matched with Jose, like some of our kids did know and how much longer, so Cruz died in July, in July. And then when did you bring Jose home? March. March? Yeah. So just describe to me the feelings of, you know, your first meeting. With Cielo Cruz, he’s in a hospital bed fast, forward months later. And now your gotcha day is with little Jose described to me, the emotions of that gotcha day. And you see Jose for the first time. How, how does that what’s going on in your head? I mean scare to that I was like, what are we doing? We are going to, we’re going to go meet this kid that I have no idea if he’s even gonna like me. Like, it is like I told rod, I remember feeling like it’s totally out of your control. And like, everybody hates that. Like, that’s not fun, you know, but as soon as he walked in and he was super shy, which is so funny, um, and it was like, we just knew, you just know like, okay, Like this is going to be okay. And, you know, I remember saying like, is he even going to want to come home with no idea? How is he going to respond? And I remember we have a picture, like, all we had to say is a lot of which is ice cream. I mean, Whereas, I didn’t realize that ice cream, he loves. And they said to him in Spanish, like, do you want to go get ice cream? But yeah, your mom and dad. And he was like all excited. So like we basically went out and he was like, what’s, what’s your favorite flavor? it’s my favorite food. But yeah, if you asked about the one word. It’s faith. And so like every step of the way was a fake journey for us and our family, especially me. Like it was just, I saw the families to describe in one word what adoption means to them. Right. And mine was fate and this is the exact reason why I write it because it’s like, Each step of the way, like for me, if I didn’t have faith, like it would have been challenging and Alva checked out, you know? And so the experience together was amazing. It was a moment in time. He came out and we had the book and the Teddy bear and all that kind of stuff. Amazing moment in time with him for the first time. And, um, but then the incredible journey of, of actually bringing him to the motel that we’re saying like, You get Jose, you get this child that you don’t know, and we bring them home. So fast forward all this time. And now we’re here. What, a year later, a year later, tell me over this past year, what has, how has Jose changed your family? And so many ways so blessed. I mean, we have got this child who is easygoing and. Uh, he loves the kids and everybody, all everybody told me, you wait until the six month wait or the three month. Mark is first and wait and listen, six months, mark. You’re gonna start seeing some things come out. So, you know, I’m preparing my heart to be like, okay, what does that look like? Which I don’t know if that’s good or bad to say that. I don’t think that’s. That’s what we heard. We want to be prepared. Those are reality. We never had a child. We never had adopt the child before. I didn’t know, like watch out home. Right. Um, and we just never, we never experienced those things. Like he’s just his, from the get go. I mean, he has been like super compliant and just like gets, just loves. Everybody loves people. So like, He’s definitely changed our family. He’s brought a four year old energy level again into our family. So for me, it’s like, you know, but, um, but overall he’s just, yeah, we were so fortunate. A lot of the adoption books say like when you bring a child home, just make sure you spend time with that family. So you don’t go out and work settings. We come home to cook and we’re quarantined So we come home, everything’s wiped off our schedule, everything’s wiped off. And so here we are in our home, um, and with our family of now seven bonding. And, um, so that moment in time, Actually amazing time for our family and to like come together. And like he said, like he just like ones right in like everything with the other kids want to do. He wants to be with them and they look at him as like a little brother and just kind of bring them along. And I mean, he’s been a blessing. It’s been amazing. I think the financial is always a issue too, you know, it’s like, wow, it’s a lot, you know, but I, you know, we all have always said that. You know, we’re not all called to maybe bring a child into our room, but we are all called to help take care of work then. Yeah. So whether that’s a financial, whether that’s prayer, whether that’s bringing a child home, like we’re all respectful everybody’s responsibility. So I went to agencies and organizations. Would you like to mention an honor for helping bring those at home? Um, well Brittany’s hope was a huge one for us. Um, they given us a nice size. Um, for, for actually for both of them, they hadn’t helped us at that point. And then also, um, Madison adoption based out of I think shell health also is another one. Um, was a good organization. There’s just, there’s so many resources out there. I think that’s what people don’t realize. There are so many grants. There are actually unbelievable. Like when I start digging, it’s like, wow. So I show hope and Brittany, so four to two that we have, I love your story. I love your family. And they say it’s so sweet. And I think you have such a great. A great story of how, you know, so oftentimes we talk about how living by faith and not by fear, but I think more often than not, it’s not that faith is the absence of fear, but faith is the weapon with which we fight fear. It doesn’t mean it’s an absence of it. It’s more so the tool that you use in order to fight it. And, um, I just think you guys have embodied that so much. Hey guys, Ana here. If you found this video helpful, then you do not want to miss this video right here beside me on the screen, click on it. I know you’re going to enjoy it. You guys remember you can not be redefined only redeveloped one imperfect day at a time. Your story matters and you are loved.